2017 - Let's Remember to Breathe

I can't say I've been exactly eager for this New Year. There is much on my mind. And my heart. I am certain there will be many good moments. But it's not like there is some guarantee of a fresh new bright perfect year ahead. 

I feel overwhelmed. I'm in a few groups that are trying to encourage action and activism and political change. I have so much on my plate already. I'm trying not to feel guilty by focusing on just improving myself - being more patient, less reactive, a better listener. In my head we each can make a big impact if we start with our own little circles of existence and especially within our own selves. I hear others saying this is a cop out and it's not enough. That we have to do more. But I don't have more to give.

I have to put my kids and the health of our family first - mental and emotional. I need to be able to teach them how to handle their tempers, how to face and push through adversity, and how to handle disappointment. How to push past all of that. How to rely on one another. The best way to do that is to learn to model what I want them to learn. I have to start with fixing those things in me.

It's not big and grand. It won't rid the world of the looming dangers. But maybe I can bring more peace to our home. Fortify my kids for the battles out there that they will surely face.

And, it will have to be enough.

I will keep my eyes and heart open for those opportunities that may come along where I can make a difference in someone else's day. I will try to be more aware. I will speak up. I will point out inequity to my kids as I have always done. I will try to do it gently and with heart (not judgment) to others around me.

But I will also force myself to keep this within my available bandwidth and not rob my kids and husband of my sanity and compassion because I let myself get overdrawn and overwhelmed. I will guard my heart against the anger and frustration I see and hear around me. It's almost like a mental yoga pose I am working to master. It will take practice. Every damn day. It will take focus. Every. Day.

And it will BE . . . plenty. 

Namaste,

Heidi

Comments

Beautifully written! I wish

Beautifully written! I wish you that peace from the bottom of my heart.

Thank-you, Monica

And peace be to you and yours, also and always. The only way forward is together. <3

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